Friday, March 5

Lost Friday - "Sundown."


Season 6 - Episode 6: "Sundown."

Another Lost Friday is upon us. We have much to discuss. What a ridiculous week.

On Monday, we had to take apart and wash our couch, as one of the cats thought it would be funny to piss on it. For me, a shaking ball of anxiety with OCD, this pretty much shot my night in the foot. Nonetheless, we gave Rory a stern talking-to about what life on the street would be like for him (awful), and settled back into normalcy. On the floor, naturally.

On Tuesday, Rory then took it upon himself to crap on the Guest Bedroom bed. I discovered this after coming home from a long day of work and having to listen to people tell me how unoriginal my latest Mix-Tape Trade is (it isn't). Again, I don't take kindly to feces in any form, so I once again flipped out and went on a house-cleaning binge. When this did not satisfy my neurosis, I left the house and did two weeks worth of grocery shopping to calm myself down. While I can typically handle the big things with relative ease, it's the multitude of little things that send me into a trademark rage.

I have not been fun to get along with this week.

On Wednesday, the Missus told me she needed to stop at Target after work. She said she needed hair spray. What I didn't realize was that the transaction would take place in the parking lot of the retail store, out of the back of a woman's SUV. Apparently, the Missus was on Craigslist (perusing anonymous hookups, I presume), when she saw that a local beauty salon was going out of business, and selling their remaining inventory for dirt-cheap. The Missus is addicted to a particular kind of hair spray that is- I kid you not- 22 dollars a bottle, and thought that this would be a good way to soothe her insanely expensive haircare needs while also saving money and helping a local (unemployed) businesswoman.

It was one of the stranger parking lot transactions on record.

On Thursday, we had to take the stained/soaked Guest Bedroom comforter to the laundromat, which marked the first time in well over a decade that I have stepped foot inside such a tragic and lonely establishment. The last time I had to pay to wash my clothes was 2004, when we had to pump quarters into the machines in our apartment's Laundry Room. I don't remember those days too fondly; we always had to walk to the nearby bowling alley in order to get change. There was a machine inside of the arcade, which was always an extremely depressing walk, especially in the dead of Winter.

This was not the way I wanted to spend my week. This is also around the time where I hit the roof and stayed there.

My fuse, attention span, anxiety and overall I've-had-it-ness with everyone around me was impossible to ignore. While I typically embrace and enjoy the 'It only happens to me' lifestyle that I write about on a daily basis, it's sometimes not as fun as you would think. I got myself so worked up that I actually got sick with a disgusting cough, no less than 24 hours before a long and relaxing weekend in Chicago (where I probably am as you read this, voiceless and tripping out on Oxycodone). I'm not even bringing my phone; if I die, you pricks can find out about it in the paper.

But just in case I do die, I'll be staying here, eating here, and getting drunk here.


("YESSS!")

This week's episode of Lost was absolutely fantastic. Certainly worthy of 16 Haikus. Enjoy!

ALTERNATE-DIMENSION TIMELINE (2004):


("So...what's it like having sex with the only woman I've ever loved?")

Unrequited love.
Boomerangs from Australia.
Dinner is over.


("Christ, and I thought I was crazy.")

The dry-cleaning game
Is a real dirty business
When you've got no cash.

Take the kids to school;
Omer had an accident.
That douche shot Alex!


(FUN FACT: This marks the 1,000th time Sayid has been hit with a plank!)

Unrequited love's
Not really unrequited.
You don't deserve her.


("GOODBYE STOP SIGN!")

Sayid meets Keamy.
Bitch better have my money.
Everyone is killed.

Jin's in the freezer.
Me No Speak-A-Dee-English.
Hangs with the wrong crowd.

PRESENT-DAY TIMELINE (2007):

Sayid is evil.
Yes, Dogen knows Karate.
Best fight scene ever!

Man In Black with Claire.
He should have just gotten her
To move the ash ring.


("Locke...you're so...nude!")

Miles and Sayid.
"You were dead for two hours."
Event Horizon?


(Insert your own Silence Of The Lambs quote here.)

"Sayid; kill fake Locke
To prove that you are still good
And not Kill-rusty."

Sayid can't kill Locke.
Locke promises Nadia.
Sayid joins his team.


("...the HELL, man?!")

"Listen up, Temple!
The Man In Black is coming!
I hope you like death!"

Kate runs into Claire.
"Hey, I kidnapped your baby."
Claire is not amused.


(Sayid works on his Synchronized Swimming routine under the cover of darkness.)

Sayid: Pure Evil.
He swaggers with his dagger.
Fake Locke does the rest.

The beach folk show up.
Ben. Sun. Frank. Squarehead.
Sorry. Jin just left.


("He's dead. I'll let you know if his condition improves.")

Battle lines are drawn.
Locke leads an army of beards
Against...Hurley? Jack???

There you have it; another Lost Friday in the books. Sound off in the comments section, enjoy your weekend and tide yourself over with the following links:

Season 6 - Episode 1/2.
Season 6 - Episode 3.
Season 6 - Episode 4.
Season 6 - Episode 5.
I'm On Twitter.
I'm On Facebook.
Surviving 815.

I'll be in Chicago all weekend, returning with what I think is a pretty cool essay on Monday. See you then.

Monday, March 1

The CDP Worldwide Mix-Tape Trade #7.



It's back!

After six previous Trades and nearly 150 different Mix-Tapes created by nearly 100 different people, the CDP Worldwide Mix-Tape Trade is making it's triumphant return just in time for Spring.

For those of you who are new to the Trade, or for the alumni in need of a reminder, the CDP Worldwide Mix-Tape Trade is a chance for CDP readers from all over the globe to not only create a Mix-Tape for each other, but to receive one as well. It breaks down like this:

1. If you want to be involved with the Trade, you can easily sign up by leaving me a comment or sending an e-mail to communistdance@yahoo.com. Be sure to leave me a name and an e-mail address. The deadline to sign up is Saturday, March 13 at 11pm Central Time, so don't procrastinate, or you'll miss out! In previous Trades, the sign-up period was only one week instead of two, so hopefully we'll get a larger and varied group this time around.

2. On Monday, March 15, I will draw and post a random partnering of everyone that signed up for the Trade, so not only will you see who you'll be creating a Mix for, but also can see who will be creating one for you. This is the fun part. You will then get to work on creating a Mix-Tape (on CD, most likely) that follows the set theme of this particular Trade (see below for theme). In tune, someone will start making one for you. I function as the middleman concerning all communications, such as sorting out mailing addresses and the like. Don't be afraid to get a hold of me as the Trade rolls along if you have any questions.

3. When you're done creating your (no doubt, fantastic) Mix, you'll mail it off to the person that was drawn for you, and in tune, you'll receive a Mix in the mail from whomever drew your name. You'll have two weeks; the deadline to mail out your Mix will be Monday, March 29. If you think for any reason that you may go deadbeat, don't bother signing up. I mean that.

Simple as that. Sign up, make a Mix, mail it out, and you'll get one back. This is one of the more fun and reader-collaborated things that we do here on the CDP, and it's always a blast and a chance for people to come out of their lurker shells and join the vocal masses. The artwork, musical depth and participation never cease to amaze me.

Your theme for the CDP Worldwide Mix-Tape Trade #7 is...

'Your New Favorite Band.'

Easy, tiger; let me explain. The theme of your Mix will be anything you want, provided that it spotlights one single band, artist or songwriter. That's it. In a world where we've created hundreds of Mixes with thousands of songs, this is your chance to be as creative as possible within a scope that's as limited as the body of work you choose to spotlight.

You may feel that this is a disappointment. Too easy. Here's where it gets interesting.

Any Mix-Tapes sent my way will be entered for a chance to win a Free CDP T-Shirt of your choice. I will select the winner based on creativity of Mix, depth of catalog, and whether or not I'm comfortably familiar with the band or artist being showcased (the goal being that I'm NOT familiar). From the entries, I will proclaim a 'New Favorite Band' and reward the Mix creator thusly. Again, we're all essentially looking for a Greatest Hits collection from a band, artist or songwriter that we've never heard of before.

This is where it gets interesting. Sure, you could select some completely obscure artist, but their catalog might be too minuscule for a truly creative Mix. You could select someone with a deep body of work, but that artist risks being too popular to adequately satisfy what we're looking for with this particular Mix. The perfect balance of talent, depth and obscurity is ideal, and will probably leave you standing in front of your CD collection for hours, wondering what your best musical secret might be (and how many people may already know it).

Let's make the seventh CDP Worldwide Mix-Tape Trade the biggest one ever. Sign up via comments or e-mail, remember to leave a name and e-mail address, and make sure that you do it by Saturday, March 13!

Thanks much. Sound off in the comments section, start brainstorming what your 'New Favorite Band' Mix will look like, and enjoy your day.